Ferociously Observant

It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not. -Anon.

Everything has changed. Everything is strange. 11 May 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — ferociouskater @ 2:37 pm

Vacations are funny in that a lot of times, when we go someplace far away that is so different from our own home, we get back and everything seems a little different. Maybe we have trouble sleeping in our own beds, we have to get used to the sounds of a settling house at night, and even things that used to come easily (like driving on the right hand side of the road) come slowly back to us like we are waking from a strange dream. Most of the time it is the break in routine that occurs when we travel that creates this “otherworldly” aspect to our own homes when we return, and we are back to normal within a few days.

I’ve never had a problem with reintegration after a big trip. A couple days rest, getting back to work, and finally unpacking the last item from the sandy suitcase usually does it for me.

I knew I would be returning home to boxes half-packed from our move. We are closing on our first house on the 15th, so naturally we won’t have much time at all to settle back here. I don’t think I realized how close the move came before we left for Cayman, and now I’m wondering if I couldn’t have been more prepared. But regardless, I know that a couple weeks in the new house, with a backyard and my own study, will have me settled in (even if not totally unpacked) in no time.

But this time it’s different. I return from the island and find that everything has changed. Everything will change. And the last semblance of normalcy I had before coming back to what I can only describe as Bizarro World was on that island. I’m having difficulty seeing my previous comfort zone as comforting any longer. Coming home didn’t feel like returning to any home I remember.

I want to go back.

Good old Will rings in my head, with his winds and tide, but I am only slightly comforted in the knowledge that this different world that will unfold over the next few months will become my comfort zone. Tonight I can only look at my dogs as foreign beings, jump when my fridge starts whining, and wish with all my might that I was back on the beach, under the stars.

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